when daveed doesn’t know which act it is
US government plans to use drones to fire vaccine-laced M&Ms near endangered ferrets.
Me: nice Hamilton reference
The Most-Googled Question in Each State. We were going to single out a specific state to shame over this, but honestly, it’s too hard to pick.
How many people in Michigan heard that Mr. T was dead…
Poe’s Law: when you can’t actually tell if a thing is satire or if this is what people are googling in different states
OH SO THIS IS WHERE THAT LAST THING IS FROM
Yo I don’t even care if this is legit or not it is *hilarious*.
John Adams: Can I kick it?
Alexander Hamilton: Who unfriended me?
Aaron Burr: Is wine gluten free?
John Jay: Where my dogs at?
Benjamin Franklin: Do cats fart?
Thomas Jefferson: Why is Virginia for lovers?
James Madison: What is emo?
George Washington: What is emo?
>Hamilton: Write your way out of it!
Of course! Writing! the only way you know to get yourself out of the sticky situations you often find yourself in, through absolutely no fault of your own whatsoever. You’re a genius!
Yes! Yes!!!!!! Truly this is the best thing you’ve ever written! You must publish this Post-haste. If this doesn’t get you out of that mess with the affair, Nothing will!
There’s no way this could possibly go wrong.
>days in the future, but not many
well that didn’t work.
it begins to dawn on you that everything you just did may have been a colossal mistake.
this is my happy place
On First Looking into Chapman’s Homer
Much have I travell’d in the realms of gold,
And many goodly states and kingdoms seen;
Round many western islands have I been
Which bards in fealty to Apollo hold.
Oft of one wide expanse had I been told
That deep-brow’d Homer ruled as his demesne;
Yet did I never breathe its pure serene
Till I heard Chapman speak out loud and bold:
Then felt I like some watcher of the skies
When a new planet swims into his ken;
Or like stout Cortez when with eagle eyes
He star’d at the Pacific—and all his men
Look’d at each other with a wild surmise—
Silent, upon a peak in Darien.
My love for this poem is perhaps only equaled by my love for a particular flavour of frozen yogurt (Blackjack Cherry!) by a company that happens to be called Chapman’s, which I discovered when I was catsitting at my friend Moti’s house one day. I ended up eating all of it that was in his freezer. I wrote him this as an apology.
ON FIRST LOOKING INTO CHAPMAN’S YOGURT
Much have I travell’d in the realms of sweets,
And many goodly snacks and dishes seen;
Round many supermarkets have I been
Which hordes of foodies brave to get their eats.
Oft of one sweet delight that nothing beats,
That deep-bowl’d ice cream, I’d heard praises sung;
Yet did it never much impress my tongue
Till I ate Chapman’s frozen yogurt treats:
Then I felt like some watcher of the pies
When a new flavour rushes his palate;
Or like stout Cortez, when with all his guys
He took a bite of cacao – and the fate
Of snacks he pondered with a wild surmise –
Silent, with a mouthful of chocolate.
YOUR DRAGON NAME
- last two letters of your first name
- middle two letters of your last name
- first two letters of your mother’s name
- last letter of your father’s name
mine would be Urlelan. Reblog and tag this with yours!
I love this because half of the people are getting amazing, fantasy names and the other half are getting unpronounceable ones.
Ooh not bad 😂
Desi dragon anyone?
I got ‘Sophie’s World of Small Things’. What about you?
A Clockwork Anxiety or Ardor!
Kinda sounds like it should be a Sherlock fanfic or something